Toe In: On Finding New Jobs and Being Published

I think I avoid writing about my life because I don't want to face it, much like I try to avoid the "So, what do you do?" question. It's astonishing to look back and realize that I've been applying to jobs for months, 3 years really, and...nothing. I can only imagine that I must be doing something wrong and this is where my downward spiral often starts.

It's just so hard to imagine that with all the cover letters and all the resumes, I don't even get an interview, much less a rejection. But, I've started to imagine the job pool as a huge school of fish, with many many fishing poles. As difficult as it is for me to manage hooking a job, I imagine how many other people are searching, some a lot older than me. That being said, it's incredibly hard on my already fragile ego to imagine that I'm not the one who will make a catch. Metaphors aside, I've been getting pretty desperate. I've applied for tutoring jobs at local colleges, event planning jobs and I even signed up for a dog-sitting site.

On the side, I've been submitting poems to literary magazines and thinking of ways to become a freelance writer. It's slow going when you are your own boss. You have to constantly be thinking of new ideas. You have to constantly be active and be prepared to (yet again) get a lot of no's. A few months ago, I finally received an email, from an online literary magazine, saying that they wanted to submit one of my poems. I was ecstatic. It felt so good to know that someone thought my writing was worthwhile.

Then two months ago, I heard from an feminist blog that I had submitted writing samples to, in the hopes of becoming a regular contributing author. After a month, I had given up on hearing back when the Editor-in-Chief emailed me. She said that they were looking for someone who could cover current events happening in feminism. "You seem to have a very journalistic writing style. I want to see that you can dig deep and report on feminist topics strongly." She asked me to write a mock article. I was excited and nervous. I scanned through many different new sites, trying to figure out what would be relevant, news-worthy and interesting. Finally, I found several pieces on the a feminist perspective of the World Cup. I wrote about sexism related to FIFA and the lack of coverage of the World Cup, due to the players' gender.

The editors loved it. They thought it was unique and fresh. It felt amazing to have my writing be accepted and to actually be using my college degree. It's been two months now and I've been writing pretty monthly blog posts for the site. Of course, it's not paid, but just seeing my name in print is satisfying. It's inspiring to see people looking at my articles, sharing them with others and offering their point of view. I'm learning a lot, including what to takes to write a good story, how a blog is different from newspaper articles and while it's not a job, it's a way in. It's my foot in the door, even if it's just a toe. Maybe someday, I'll be able to swing the door wide open, but for now, this will do.

You can see my blog posts by heading over to Bitchtopia. Look out for my poem this October, 2015, online at the Corvus Review.