When It Rains

That last post was pretty long, so I thought I should take a break and return with a conclusion. This one is a little long too, but a lot has happened in the few days before (and after my interview)

On Wednesday, the day before the interview, I felt pretty well prepared. I had done my research and felt like I could talk about my experience well. Thursday morning, I entered the building and signed in at the front desk. I was getting pretty nervous  - so nervous that I just wrote my name and forgot to write the time I had arrived. I walked up to the elevator and found the door marked with the name of the organization.

I paused, took a breath and took off my heavy coat and walked up to the door. I didn't know whether to knock or just go in. Was it one of those offices where the front area was a lobby? I pushed the door open slowly and poked my head in, saying, "Hello?" There was a man sitting by the front door and he greeted me. I apologized, saying I wasn't sure whether to knock or not. He welcomed me in, called out to the back office and let the someone know that I had arrived.

It was a small office, but it had a lot of light. I walked back to the other office after a voice told me to come in. The voice belonged to the woman I had had the video interview with. We chatted a little about the weather and my trip getting here. I remember it was very warm inside, compared to the frigid winter air outside. I sat down, trying to calm my nerves as I got out my notebook and a pen. The man joined me and sat down across from me. There were only three people who worked there and I met with two of them.

It started out well, with me talking about how I went about tackling the test I had been sent after my first interview. The test was a story about fish aggregation and how it lead to overfishing. I had to take a press release, create a longer story for a magazine article, pick 10-12 photos from a group I had been sent and come up with a social media plan, that included how I would come back to the story 6 months later.

After that, it just began to go downhill. They started asking very tough questions. They explained that the social media plan I had created as part of my test and the way I would return to the story were way too ambitious. It was too much for me to take on in this position. She asked for a more realistic idea of how I would accomplish this. I talked about trying to reach out to the scientists who had worked on the story and local people in the area. But she said that this wasn't correct and I needed to focus more on the social media aspect. I was started to get nervous and doubt myself. I thought a minute and suggested reaching out to social media groups from the area that focused on environmental issues and conservation.

My next big mistake, (which apparently other applicants also did) was forgetting to mention the company in the magazine article. I assumed it would have been printed by the company, which of course I shouldn't have. Luckily, I had the chance to explain how I would fix this if I was able to redo the project. 

One of the hardest questions came from the man that I would be replacing. He gave an example of receiving a finished story involving storks and their habitat becoming a garbage dump. National Geographic was going to report the story and then decided to drop it. He asked who would I reach out to, in hopes of them picking up the story. I was at a loss. I couldn’t name anyone specific. For some reason, I couldn't remember the organizations they worked with or companies that seemed logical. I made a few suggestions, but I knew they were too vague. I started to babble a bit. The woman finally answered the question for me. She admitted that it was a hard question.

I felt my heart sinking. I knew that I had come off as inexperienced. I finished up the interview, shook their hands, looked them straight in the eyes and gave them my best smile, I left the building and just felt defeated. I felt like I had let everyone down who had reached out and tried to help me. I only told a few people, but they all sent me words of encouragement and advice, which made me feel a little better. In my mind, I went back to the room and thought about what had happened. I could have been better prepared. They had both asked tough questions and when I couldn't answer them, I could feel them giving up on me. If I couldn't please them in the interview, how would I have done working there? They obviously had high expectations and for a good reason. It was a great company who did amazing, important work. I also thought that it seemed like they needed someone who had been doing this for a while, who knew how to run a social media campaign. And that was not me. I'm just trying to shove my foot into the door so I can edge into the room. 

In better news, the day before this interview, I had received an email from another company, who also wanted to meet me for an interview. I had been connected to this company through a friend, who thought I would be great for this job. It was a marketing position at a non-profit marketing firm for local wineries, breweries and vineyards.

When it rains, it pours right? I mean, I have been applying for jobs off and on for about three and a half years. Now all of a sudden I have two in one week. What are the odds?

My interview for this company went completely different. Having had this first terrible interview, I prepared as much as I could. I wanted to be on my A game. I read every part of their website, researched the staff and looked at all their partners. I felt like if I didn't do well on this interview, I would be very upset. It would mean that I had a problem with interviewing and I wouldn't be able to get a job until I fixed this problem.

The next day, I wasn't nervous up until I entered the building. It was also a small office, with four staff members - one more than the day before. They were in the middle of a project and were funny, making small talk with me and joking about their mess as they cleared off their big table. We sat down and it began. I met with all of them. It was a completely different atmosphere. They were friendly, made more jokes and it just felt like more of a conversation than an interview.

They're a fairly new company and it seemed like they were very open to my ideas. I suggested more videos on their website, which they liked. I mentioned trying to reach out to home brew contests (people who brew their own beer and enter contests). I managed to slip in that I had a few friends who brewed their own beer and the events were really good. The founder of the company got pretty excited about that and told me to “Ask them what they were interested in!” In other words figure out how to market towards them. I came away with a good feeling.

I am pretty bummed about the first interview. But, I think that I know I wasn't cut out for that position. I'm just entering the work force and I need something that I grow into, rather than just get thrown into. I was excited about the prospect of working for the second company. I hoped they liked me as much as I liked them.

The next few days, I thought a lot about what I wanted to happen and how I should follow up. After my bad first interview, at the suggestion of my mother, I had turned to a family friend who had been working in marketing for many years. I also asked another family friend who worked in training for companies' employees. The first friend had a lot of good advice about the kind of questions to ask, what sort of research to do and the type of suggestions to make about their social media. The second friend gave me expert advice about how to talk about myself and my experience. With all of this, I felt pretty confident about the second job. I tried to express my enthusiasm at the idea of working for them. I felt sure I hadn't got the first one, but I tried to explain that I knew I needed more experience, but if I had some more training, I would get the hang of it. I sent my thank you notes off and with it my good thoughts.

Now came the waiting. It turned out, I didn't have to wait too long. That Monday, Sam and I were home in NY, visiting my parents for my birthday. We had just finished dinner and were eating my birthday cake, a lemon meringue. (It was delicious, by the way.) I heard my phone go off. I had one email. I saw it was from the founder of the marketing company. It said:

Hi India,
Thanks very much for coming in for an interview; we enjoyed meeting you. 
While your background and interest were strong, the committee has decided to pursue other candidates. We wish you the best of luck. 

Disappointment welled up inside me. The job I had felt most confident about, the one I could really see myself in, had just rejected me. I was upset and frustrated. I had felt so sure that this time would be it. The worries about student loans and actually starting a career would end. The constant reminder to myself that I was always on the brink of being broke would vanish. I felt like I was teetering, about to swan dive into a pool of opportunity and instead, cartoon-like, it had turned into a kiddie pool or a tin bucket and I had landed, head stuck and legs flailing, comically.  

A week later, the other company also sent me a rejection email. I wasn't surprised. I spent a while trying not think about either of these emails. It wasn't just being rejected (yet again). It was the fact that this meant it wasn't just that there was someone more experienced out there but that I was a bad interviewer, I had a problem and until I solved this problem, I wasn't going anywhere.

I ended up asking the woman from the marketing company for feedback. She said a lot of things. One of the biggest things she mentioned was that I needed to be more confident. This comes as no surprise to me, but I thought I was at least managing to exude some pretense of being confident. Obviously my inner thoughts were bubbling over and revealing themselves. The other thing that she mentioned was that I didn't seem like I was "hungry" enough. This surprised me as I was so excited at the thought of working for their company. Maybe because I was nervous, so it didn't show through or maybe because I didn't try to match up my skills to what they were looking for. Either way, it gave me a lot to think about.
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I know some people will think I'm weird but I'm a big believer in fate. I think that things happen for a reason. You pick something because somewhere in the universe, something drives you to it and as a result of your decision, your life can change. I'm not sorry I went on these two interviews. Every experience is important, good or bad. I walked away with two different interviews with completely different feelings and learned something from both. Whatever happens on the next interview, I know this is just a small wave in a large ocean of opportunity.